Festive Aspirations

This special feature provides information, guidance and encouragement during the festive season.

The festive season can be fun and at the same time it can be challenging or very stressful.

The information on this page is for individuals with hidden differences along with direct contacts including family, friends and other contacts during Christmas and beyond.



Expectation
Christmas can be a very stressful time for everyone, but it can also lead to particular expectations and standards on how to cope. This includes dealing with any levels of situations or climate when spending time with your loved ones during Christmas and New Year. However, if you make some preparations for situations that may occur, it can remove any pressure. This includes developing notes and reminders on how you navigate through the festive holidays with your relatives and close friends. Especially on Christmas Day and Boxing Day.

In addition, if you are spending Christmas with your loved ones at their locations, then it is also important to prepare and organise how to cope with your loved one's environments.

This is important, especially when accessing items within tight places or handling particular items which are delicate or fragile.

Guidance for Hidden Differences during the days at Christmas


21st -23rd December

Plan with the people you are spending Christmas with how to cope and arrange a backup plan if you become stressed or anxious. Also, if you could face a potential situation, that might be too much. However, never wait until things go wrong; otherwise, not only will you be penalised, but you'll be to blame for spoiling everybody's Christmas intentionally or not.

Christmas Day and Boxing Day with families and friends can be a positive way for the festive season. It can have several levels of emotions and mindsets. In other words, different situations may occur that you may not expect, which might turn out very positively. However, there might be challenging or very negative situations which you may not be prepared for and do not have any procedures to manage. It may not be about how a person necessarily feels; it may be a specific circumstance, or someone might be extremely sensitive to something you may not understand. The important thing is you must make adjustment preparations when varying situations that can affect the people around you or when a specific unplanned situation occurs. You will also need to prepare for different levels of scenarios that could occur which can affect how you cope.

Another suggestion is to prepare a time out, which involves going for a walk around the area where you spend Christmas day, for this should only last about 10 to 20 minutes. Always walk around safe areas and never go beyond 20 minutes as you could cause other worrying and concerns

If you are spending time with a family or friend overnight now is the time to pack and get organised. To make sure not to get stressed about getting clothes and other items packed and organised, make sure you get clothes washed 5 days beforehand and get clothes ironed and packed two days before. This means you're not likely to be stressed on Christmas Eve.


24th - 27th December

Check your notes and reminders in preparation for spending time with your family and friends and to be organised to navigate your day with your loved ones during this Christmas Day and Boxing Day.

Remind your family and friends you're spending Christmas with that you may have certain time-outs once or twice.

During the Christmas season and towards the new year, organise a list of the appreciated people to send Christmas greetings. Some could be mobile or video calls, sending emails or instant messaging (such as Facebook Messenger or WhatsApp). If you are making mobile phones or video calls, please do not get in touch too early or too late. Some people do appreciate contact at inappropriate times and like to have a quiet Christmas and New Year. So be considerate throughout the festive season.

If you find writing & sending messages very stressful then use digital note-taking apps for digital devices such as mobile and tablets. Also, use spelling and grammatical checking apps to reduce any writing errors. Then, when you are happy with what you've written, you copy the text and then paint it to the person you want to send a message to or use the note you have written as part of your phone call to someone.


28th - 30th December

The period between Christmas and New Year can be a challenging time for some. Especially if you had a negative experience or you are going through an unresolved situation that can affect how you feel. During this period of time, you need to have several strategies, including relaxation breathing techniques, regular outdoor walks in safe areas and preparing to go to specific leisure attractions where you feel comfortable.

You can also exercise specific hobbies. For instance, if you have a creative plan or practice your painting and drawing. Or practice Specific sporting activities in your garden or at an open park.

Try to use your contact lists and notes to get in touch with different people each day or every other day. However, don't react too persistently, if one of your contacts does not reply when there might be a reason which cannot be explained in the short term.


Towards the New Year

The period between Christmas and New Year can lead to reflective thoughts and feelings. If things do not so well as you planned or had a difficult situation that has happened never use your difficulties to blame yourself. Focus on anything you have accomplished within the past twelve months no matter how small or great. Use this to plan on what goals and targets you would like to achieve and accomplish for the following year ahead. Please note when you prepare goals and targets it is important not to use a large list or any goals and targets that are not realistic. Some of your ideas may be easier, and some make it harder. With hard ideas, you need to develop a focus list towards a particular goal or target. You could also use this idea towards your New Year's resolution.



Expolore more information below

Extra information

Select on the title bars below which reveals additional information

  • For Hidden Differences

    For Hidden Differences

    The information below is for people with hidden differences (Autism, ADHD, Dyslexia, Dyspraxia & Social Anxiety)

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    Plan your Christmas and New Year's as well as organise actions and tasks to be done, but also strategise on how you navigate yourself and manage at any gatherings.



    Don't wait until situations go wrong which can affect your coping mechanisms. Always prepare in advance and strategise. This includes time out when needed and adjusting to different situations and circumstances around you.





    It is important to prepare for every scenario during Christmas and New Year, especially if things go wrong when you become stressed or anxious or if you face an anxiety attack.

  • For contacts of hidden differences

    For contacts of hidden differences

    If you are spending time with your friends, family, or contacts with hidden differences, it is positive if you plan any potential scenarios and circumstances that occur.



    Plan to enable time-out moments and for situations when it might be too much. Discuss in advance or on the day with a person with differences in developing ways forward.



    The situation changes and discusses with hidden differences some options. When being in contact, avoid going into deep discussions on issues about some which might affect their relationship with anyone


    Regardless of any standards or expectations do not use this to pressurise or disrespect a person with hidden differences. Also, you must never use a person's difficulties to make unhelpful criticism or make any critical lecture.


    When spending time with loved ones including those with hidden differences, do not draw attention to the difficulties against skills or abilities which they can't cope with.


    Instead, focus on their strengths and positive attributes without taking advantage of them.


    Never suggest or pressurise something if a person with hidden differences is not comfortable doing it. When spending time with a person with differences, It is important to accept when they need to take time out and when they need to leave.


    Avoid drawing attention to a person with differences for any misunderstandings or misinterpretations.


    A reminder for some people with differences hearing background music continuously for a long period may be too much, so know when to stop or have a break


    The entire experience can be very draining, with some people with hidden differences. With that in mind, some people need to adapt adjustment methods to prevent fatigue and struggle in particular environments than normal. So be supportive of any adjustments

     they make and never make a perception on how unusual the particular adjustments


    If a person with differences has reacted upset, do not react by telling them off with demanding threats. Instead, persuade yourself to ask what's upsetting you. Whatever they answer do not react with any irritated emotion. I just made a suggestion, but it must be in a calm and respectful tone. This will maintain stability and sustainability.


    Sometimes, something small can turn into an uneasy tension between two or more people. When some people with hidden differences witness uneasy situations, they can suffer stressful side effects against their coping mechanisms and their well-being. This

     side effect can last days or weeks afterwards. So if possible, if something serious situation occurs, it is essential to become assertive to insist on keeping the point very brief and to impose a stop point to a particular matter. This is to avoid anything

     getting out of hand


    If a person with differences is assisting you with a particular action or task needed, do not pressurise or rush them. A reminder that their difficulties affect their ability to function, so do not pressurise or disrupt their temps to assist or help you.

     The important point is to have patience and make reasonable allowances throughout


    Some people with hidden differences can find the experiences on Christmas Day and Boxing Day mentally draining; therefore, some can face tiredness much earlier than others. It is important to support them if they need a break. If a person with hidden differences lives nearby, some can only cope with 5-6 hours before they need to return home. If this occurs, show support and never remark if they are disappointed, they have not spent long enough time.


  • For everyone (incluing General Public)

    For Everyone 

    Christmas can be a joyful occasion to have some fun but never use this at the expense of hidden differences when they are seen at public places or social gatherings and parties





    Shopping around the festive season can be busy to get some bargains whether it's Christmas shopping or the Boxing Day sale into the new year. However, we must not use this excuse to physically abuse or sideline a person with hidden differences when seen at any shopping location.


    With all the busy environments, think before we react impatiently if a person with differences may struggle or take longer to navigate the access services or facilities at retailers, restaurants, cafes and other places of leisure. This also applies when

     a person with hidden differences is using public transport, regardless of the amount of other passengers nearby.



    Also, you should never use your impatience to physically abuse or disrupt a person with hidden differences.



Information and support helplines

Visit the Unity Forward's "in touch" webpage to access the online links

Visit the "in touch" page


Useful projects & Features

Higher Aspirations

The introductiory feature on the background information on the importance of valuing a person with hidden differences and as a starting point to explore the websites projects & features.

Visit Higher Aspirations


Unity Forward

The information and encouregement feature


Visit Unity Forward


Postive Value

The staring point to value a person with differences



Visit Positive Value


Valuing Hidden Differences

The project which informs the factors on valuing a person with hidden differences beyond understanding


Visit Valuing Hidden Differences


Elements of Value

Exploring a positive sense of value

Visit Elements of Value


Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year from Plus Value Awareness


Disclaimer
The information that has been provided is a family of suggestions guides based on the Project Director's observation and ground-level experiences. However some of the information guides created may not be appropriate depending on varying situations and circumstances. So always approach in provided information on this project with caution.

However the project director cannot be responsible for any errors which may occur.